SALVATION
I was born in Belfast, Ireland in the 1950's and was fortunate to be part of a Christian Family. My parents were Plymouth Brethren and I was taken to their gospel meetings since I had been a child. I also attended Sunday school in a nearby Baptist Church.
Even as a boy it was crystal clear to me that a relationship with God was about choice, and it was also something very real. I had been told both personally by my family and from the Church platform that we are all sinners, and the only way to be cleansed from sin was through the acceptance of Jesus who had died to set us free.
When I was 11 years old at our Brethren meeting one Sunday evening the preacher explained the need for Salvation in a way that I understood. It was also clear that I was not just a child now and could make this choice for myself. After the meeting I sat with the preacher and he took me through a prayer that basically acknowledged the fact that I was just like everybody else -- a sinner -- and I wanted to ask Jesus into my heart and take away my sins. As we sat together the Preacher prayed and I repeated the words. We had our heads bowed down, but I was worried so I had my eyes open a little to see if anything would happen. I can clearly remember the preacher's black sturdy shoes and the wooden floorboards in the Church, and there was a knot in the wood floorboard beside his shoe. I did not feel a terrific burden of sin go from me as I was just 11 years old. There was not much sin in my life. But what I was sure of was the fact that I was given something. I left the Church with the knowledge that Jesus and I were now together. I was not alone.
Every relationship changed for me after that. It was not I and another person in a relationship anymore. It became Lennie/Jesus and the other person. Jesus and I are part of each other.
Since then my life has not always been easy. As a member of the security forces in Northern Ireland, I was involved in many dangerous missions. These are the subjects of some of my other writings.
The Pastor of the Baptist Church that I attended as a child was shot dead by terrorists in the very room where we had class. He had dared to condemn terrorism to the press. They also shot dead the elderly gardener as they left, as he rebuked their actions and warned them of the wrath of God.
Over the years I have been angry with God about many things but we work it out. Who are we you may ask? Jesus and me; we are inseparable; he holds my hand often and teaches me about our Father and his ways.
For years I felt I was a lousy Christian because I was always trying to fight my own flesh. I would think: God I will never ever be any use to you as a warrior if I cannot even defeat my own flesh.
God told me, "Lennie - the only fight you will ever have is your own flesh. I will help you overcome your flesh, but I can only do so with your willing heart. As your flesh is overcome more and more, I can use you to fulfill my purposes in others as a witness for Me, and a willing vessel to be used by Me."
I realized that just because something went wrong last week and I handled it badly, God would not throw me out on my ear --my name is not rubbed out of the book of life -- Jesus has not abandoned me . . . no I am still secure in His love and significant in his plan. Nothing can separate us from the love of God; not even our sinful, selfish flesh.
It is because Jesus is in me and I am in Him and He is in the Father that my flesh will become uncomfortable, to say the least, if I try to dwell in a life of sin. It is because of the relationship that I push sin from my life -- not the other way round. So if you believe that if you overcome sin first, then you will have this relationship with Jesus ... you have it backwards. We come to Jesus just as we are -- sin, character flaws and all.
It is the relationship with Jesus that overcomes the sin -- not the overcoming of sin that allows the relationship.
God's power -- our surrender.
Nothing can separate us from the love of God. Not even ourselves!
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