I, Dennis Minner, was born in January of 1973. I remember listening to stories from my mom about how I was such a troubled child even as a baby. She said that I would throw tantrums even at one year old and that I would lie in my crib screaming until I would make myself vomit. I had a perfect family life and still do to this day. I was raised in a Christian home and my parents were perfect examples. I remember going to the alter when I was only 5 years old scared that I was going to not go to heaven. My whole entire teen life was spent being scared of going to hell. I never really had a passion for Christ and did not choose to drink or have sex because I was scared of my parents finding out. I was a good kid, always had a smart mouth but never got into any serious trouble. There were times that I thought I may want to go to college to become a youth pastor, but I never thought I could remain a Christian. Looking back, I don’t really know if I was ever saved, I think I just kept showing interest and kept searching for "fire insurance." So, until I left for college, I lived like I was a pretty good kid.
As I left for college, I began dabbling with alcohol and sex. I began to realize that I was getting older and there was really nothing my parents could do any longer. I joined a fraternity in college and thought I had found the family that I needed for now. There, no one judged me for drinking and having sex. No one told me not to cuss or that I should read my Bible or go to church. I never worried about the rapture or going to hell. I loved how drinking made me feel and how I forgot all my troubles. Alcohol quickly became my best friend and alter ego. I became a new over confident man when I drank, nothing in this world could stop me and I loved how I lost all inhibition. It seemed that every time I drank I was always able to find a girl at party or club that wanted to have sex so this caused me to drink more. This became my new hobby in a sense. One night after drinking I decided to drive back to my house. As a fraternity brother and I drove back I swerved and almost hit a parked car. We just laughed and thought it was so funny. I dropped him off and as I was about a mile from my house I passed out and my new truck ended up wrapped around a tree. It was warped so hard that the opposite side was dented from the truck bending. This didn’t slow me down at all because I didn’t get hurt. It didn’t phase me to slow down and reevaluate my life. As fraternity brothers, we would brag about how many girls we slept with over the weekend, the past week, the past year. With me, it took the alcohol to take away any guilt I had. As long as I was drinking then there was nothing to convict me. I thought I had figured out life. Life was for pleasure. At one point during a summer in college I became drunk for a period of 30 days. Even a spell of sickness didn’t slow me down. I didn’t need God or my family. Religion was for weak people. This was my life and I was going to live it like I wanted no matter what my mom or dad said and no matter what God was trying to tell me.
During my last year of college, I began dating a girl seriously. When I wasn’t drinking, my mind sobered and I begin to feel guilt for what I had been doing. My girlfriend kept reminding me that I was a good person and that I needed to stop feeling guilty and just have fun. She said my parents had brainwashed me into thinking that if I wasn’t living like them that I was going to go to hell. During college I went and spoke with a priest and he asked me if I was a good person. I told him yes I was but I had issues in my life that I needed to deal with. He said as long as I was good that meant God was in me because God is good. So this took care of most the guilt I was feeling.
I finished up at college and graduated with a BSBA in Marketing. Once I moved to St. Louis and began working for SYSCO Food Services I had realized that I was now completely on my own. Now I definitely didn’t have to worry about God or my parents, or did I. This time I was alone. I didn’t have a roommate or anything. My parents would call and visit and you could tell they were worried about me. I kept pushing them farther and farther away. I didn’t want to hear about that Jesus crap they kept throwing at me. Finally, they too decided to leave me alone. My girlfriend from college was cheating on me so we broke up. So, for the next two years I decided to do, drink and have sex as much as I could. I thought, the more I did all this the more happy I would become. I started getting depressed and started drinking heavier alcohol. Nothing made me happy. I was making money, had my own place, my parents didn’t bother me…but I was miserable. I began thinking I needed to get my life back with Jesus but I knew I had gone to far. No way was I getting to let go of MY life and submit to doing what others wanted. I was having fun, right? I also knew if I stopped partying then I would loss all my friends. I didn’t know any Christians and I surely wasn’t going to go to church.
Finally after being in St. Louis for about a year and a half, I got a phone call from a high school friend, Billy Lawrence, and he was moving to St. Louis. We hung out awhile and then decided since I had a two-bedroom apartment that we would save money and he would move in. On the weekends, we would go hit every bar in town and I continued drinking and having sex with whatever girl I could find. Billy went along and never drank and never picked up any girls. Billy also went to church with some of his friends on Sunday morning. Billy was a Christian. He never condemned me for what I was doing but he was a witness to what I should not be doing. The Holy Spirit really started convicted me like all of the sudden. I couldn’t figure it out but I knew I had to get my life straight. So, that caused me to run farther and faster. One night when another friend and I were drunk, someone asked Billy why he didn’t drink. Billy explained that he was a Christian and that was the end of the story. No one made fun of Billy they respected him. Well, I still knew I didn’t want any of that Christianity he had but I was OK that he did. Billy was an inspiration and didn't know it. Religions pressure but true Christians inspire!
I had joined the Army National Guard in 1992 and that kept me from ever doing drugs. They would do random checks on us at weekend drill and I had become an officer. Actually, another fact was simple drugs scared me. It wasn’t my thing even though most my friends dabbles in them and smoked pot. So, in 1998 I decided to smoke a joint for the first time. A friend and I had been at a bar and found two girls that were complete strangers. They decided to smoke some at my apartment and I said no but leave some for tomorrow and I would when I was sober. So, believe it or not, this complete stranger left a small bag with a bud. The next night my friend came back over and we smoked the pot. He was very experienced with drugs and warned me about 10 minutes into it that this was different and he loved it. I wasn’t feeling anything yet but he said relax it was gonna hit me. About the time he said that I felt like I was floating to the ceiling and thought to myself this was the greatest feeling I had ever felt! We decided to leave and go to a club and that is when whatever the pot was laced in decided to kick in. I just thought I was going to smoke a joint and get munchies in a few hours and that it would be over in a couple hours. The next 14 hours is something I will never forget! As we were sitting in the car, I remember my friends saying that had not heard me talk in awhile and this really scared me cause I had been, so I thought. I remember everything just slowing down and everything turning into a scene from a 70’s drug movie. I closed my eyes and when I opened them I was back in my apartment. I would close them again and we would be in the parking lot of the club. My mind was totally tripping and I could not grasp anything in reality. This then caused me to have my first ever panic attack. I couldn’t breath and thought I was dying. Billy was there and he kept trying to calm me down. I kept thinking that I was dying and I was going to end up in hell. I remember thinking about all the things I had done in my life and realizing that this was the final straw. I felt as though when the Bible talks about God could not look upon Jesus on the cross. I felt so much guilt and shame and nothing I prayed was working. I cried and screamed and my friends kept telling me to relax. I couldn’t I was dying with out Christ. At that moment we got back into the car and I remember feeling like I had died and my spirit was leaving my body. I remember opening my eyes and telling them I was dead. I told them that right now I was in hell because I felt a complete life without Christ. The bible is very clear that the worst part of hell is not the fire or whatever, it is in fact a complete separation of Jesus! When we got back to my apartment I was hallucinating and seeing people everywhere. I remember getting mad at Billy thinking he had called my parents. I remember seeing my old pastor and parents in my apartment and they were all crying cause I had died and was not saved. I prayed like I had never prayed before and couldn’t feel any security from
Jesus at all. Looking back I know he was there but I couldn’t see Him. My other friends left me to just be alone and suffer, but Billy stayed there by my side. He just kept praying for me and telling me I was OK. I remember looking up and I would see myself. Then I would turn around and I would be behind me too. It was the worst mind game that I would never wish on anyone. Hours later I decided I should go to bed. The hallucinations increased as I went to bed and I kept seeing myself standing at the end of my bed. My mind races and everything was amplified a hundred times. I remember watching my clock all through the night and this was the only thing that kept my sanity. I finally fell asleep.
I woke up the next morning and realized I wasn’t dead but my life had to instantly change! I went to church that morning and I remember praying all service promising God I would serve Him the rest of my life. The drug started kicking back in as we left and I had to go home. Any sounds or people cause me to freak out and start to have a panic attack. When I got home I called my mom and dad. Crying, I at 25 years old, told them what I had done. My mom said praise the Lord and begin to tell me how her, my dad, my sister, my brother-in-law and my grandma had been praying for me. Months earlier, about the time I started feeling conviction, they had designated a time to pray for me daily. They released me to God and said no matter what they just wanted me to give my life to Christ. Many people have asked me if I believe in once saved always saved or if I believe someone can loose their salvation. I am not a Bible scholar and I don’t know 100% either way, but I do know this. I don’t believe that when I was 5 years o
ld that I was saved. I don’t believe that I truly ever gave my life to Christ until I was 25. So many people get saved as fire insurance and never remember to live their life as a Christian. To me the most important aspect of being a Christian is to live like Christ and to help lead others to him! I don’t ever want to have someone go through the hardships I went through. If you give your life to Christ you too can avoid the road that I walked on!
It is so easy, all you have to do is believe Jesus dies for YOU and that HE is the only way to heaven. Jesus gives the gift of salvation freely to anyone that repents and asks for His free gift. He will accept you no matter what you have done or been through. There is not much I have not done in life and Jesus accepted me!
Romans 3:23 "For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God."
Romans 6:23a "...The wages of sin is death. But the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord."
Romans 10:9,10 "...If you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Jesus from the dead, you shall be saved; for with the heart man believes, resulting in righteousness, and with the mouth he confesses, resulting in salvation."
That is why I started Wise Men Promotions!
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